Though that statement is quite false in reference to me. It seems that everyone in this city is desperately striving to be considered a true New Yorker and believe me there are certain ways you can tell if someone has… and especially hasn’t been in the city very long…
Here are a few ways you can tell someone is not a New Yorker-
1.) Either they cross the street too early and get beeped at (which is like being “called out”) by oncoming traffic or they cross the street too late. Hesitating will result in an unpleasant trampling by hurried pedestrians.
2.) They say sorry when they bump into you. Real New Yorkers throw nasty elbows and plant violent hockey-like shoves without regard and certainly without an apology.
3.) Women who are new to the city walk to and from work in their 3-inch heels. Real NY woman throw on a pair of old sneakers with their finest work attire and smugly blow past the bluster stricken heel-wearing women.
4.) They are happy. There are only a few acceptable expressions a true New Yorker wears when walking down the street and happy certainly isn’t one of them.
5.) They walk slow-no explanation needed there, but if you aren’t in a mid-sprint you best believe you are about to hear some ungodly cussing directed your way.
6.) They are entertained by subway performers. Real New Yorkers have been there and seen that! Therefore, an old homeless man signing about 16-year old girls or two struggling transvestites doing the disco in the middle of a train doesn’t even register as something they should acknowledge.
That’s all for now-as I get more NYC sophisticated I will finish this list…and if you think you know anymore post a comment!
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